NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

The Twenty Hottest Hollywood Red Heads

By: Michael Lee

Red heads get absolutely no respect at all in Hollywood. Most natural famous redheads dye their hair some offsetting dirty blonde that winds up looking more like a sludgy green instead of letting their natural rusty locks blow free in the wind. Why? Because of you and I, or at least the men of the world. Name your top five... No ten... No twenty hottest celebrities you've seen. Of course you'd have the defaults Jessica Alba, Megan Fox, Zoey Deschanel, but just how many redheads do you have on that list? The majority of you will have none. Not because they aren't hot, because this list sure proves you otherwise, but it's because they're ignored in Hollywood. They're the underdogs, and believe you me I have respect for underdogs. Therefore it's time for Nerdism to give respect where respect is due. May I present you with: The Twenty Hottest Hollywood Red Heads:

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

20. Emma Stone- When she's not being hit on by Jonah Hill, Emma Stone spends her time stealing cars and slaughtering zombies, more or less for the heck of it.

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

19. Morgan Webb- This G4 babe knows her video games, therefore she gets bonus points for being a nerd. Unfortunately, she looses points considering she's dyed her hair every color in the book, instead of sticking to those beautiful fiery follicles.

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

18. April O'Neil- First off, yes cartoons are on this list too. Television is part of Hollywood. Second, April O'Neil was the hottest televison characters out of the 80s. She redefined the yellow jumpsuit, and her red hair was an added bonus

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

17. Rachel Nichols- Out of Transformers, He-man, and GI Joe, I can pretty much say I like GI Joe the least, but I have to give them credit for the smokin' babes featured on the show. One of the babes, Scarlett O'Hara, got quite a hottie to play her in the 2009 movie, Miss Rachel Nichols. Other nerdy roles you might have seen her in includes: A sexy computer expert in Alias or the big boobed green alien Chris Pine bangs in Star Trek.

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

16. Lois Griffin- This Family Guy milf has done numerous slutty things on screen, ranging from kissing other women, to dressing up as a naughty school girl, and even getting naked on at least three separate occasions (with a nice rear view to boot).

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

15. Mandy Moore- Mandy Moore's insanely hot looks almost makes me want to buy her album... Ha nah, just kidding. But seriously, Mandy is insanely hot. Just ask Vincent Chase. The dude threw a major bitch fit over her for like two whole seasons of Entourage.

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

14. Misty- When she was first introduced in the video games/anime, Pokemon's Cerulean City Gym Leader was just 10 years old. Now by Soul Silver and Heart Gold, misty all grown up, and only wears a bikini throughout the whole game.

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

13. Rose McGowan- Rose has shown more T&A on the red carpet than most women have in Playboy. Also, she made amputees hot in Planet Terror where she played a zombie killing stopper with a machine gun for a leg. Hot damn.

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

12. Ariel- In a movie full of secret penises, it was nice to have a redhead mermaid to look at. Had she not gained legs by the end of the movie she probably would've been lower on the chart, cause nobody likes fish tails more than, well you know, lady parts.

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

11. Jenna Fischer- Many of us know Jenna as The Office's nice and wholesome Pam, but outside the office this girls got a wildside. We've seen this in Blades of Glory, where she reveals quite a bit in some sexy lingerie, and when she acts as a total slut in Walk Hard. Though the naughtiest thing Jenna may have down is strip down for a couple of magazines every now and again. As Kevin would say "Nice!"

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

10. Scarlett Johansson (in Iron Man 2)- Sure Scarlett dyed her hair for this role and I could've just as easily chosen The Black Widow in Iron Man 2 so it would at least be natural, has the black widow posed scantily clad in numerous magazines? Nor is the Black Widow married to Ryan Reynolds (Although this is a possibility considering he will be playing Deadpool come 2011-12)!

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

9. Kari Bryon- Learning has never been this sexy. Hot red head Kari Bryon will never say no on Mythbusters, which will often result her in doing some very dangerous but sexy stunts. We've seen her wear skin tight body stockings and watched her jiggle her way into many a diving suit and now thanks to some pictures she took for NHM we've seen her wear nothing but her undies!

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

8. Jessica Rabbit- She looks a little too nonhuman and unproportionate for my tastes, but I guarantee you her assets are the only thing adults walked away remembering after watching Who Framed Roger Rabbit (shame too, cause that's a great movie).

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

7. Daphne Blake- I actually felt like Sarah Michelle Ghellar's portrayl of this damsel in distress was a downgrade, as she couldn't live up to this cartoon babes hotness. We all know that Daphne was one of the best things about Scooby Doo, and pairing her aside Velma just made her even hotter. Luckily, a few years back, it seemed the writers of the new Scooby Doo movies answered our prayers and had the gang travel to Hawaii where Daphne spent an entire hour and a half in nothing but a bikini!

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

6. Giada De Laurentiis- I watch food network on occasion. Half the time, it's for something interesting like Unwrapped or Good Eats. The other half the time it's to watch Everyday Italian starring the gorgeous Giada De Laurentiis and her excessive amount of cleavage. She's the literal reason the kitchen is so hot and nobody wants to get out. Spicy!

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

5. Mary Jane Watson- She's been featured in the movies, on television and even in the comics she a famous model and actress. This smokin' red head is a celebrity in her own right. Bonus points for being married to a super nerd like Peter Parker.

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

4. Amy Adams. Children might remember her from Enchanted. Dads might remember her ass from Night at the Museum 2. Teenage boys might remember her bottomless bikini scene in Psycho Beach Party. I, however, will always remember her as the purse girl from one of the best episodes of The Office.

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

3. Isla Fisher- She might've been psycho in Wedding Crashers but in real life she one of the funniest, and hottest, red heads around. Unfortunately, she is now married to Sacha Barron Cohen of Borat fame. Hopefully they'll but out some comedy prodigy offspring of their own soon.

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

2. Lindsay Lohan (pre-2006)- Remember when Lindsay used to be known for her red hair, perky teen boobs, and her fire crotch and not her cocaine snorting ways of today. I do too, and had she not gone off the deep end, lost 100 pounds and dyed her hair an ugly bleach blonde you could be she would have the number one spot.

NERD WARS: GI Joe Vs Transformers

1. Christina Hendricks- I'd like to say Christina Hendricks is known for her red locks more than her 38 DDD bust size and her excessively jiggling appearances on AMC's smash hit Mad Men, but in all honesty those things are probably what got her this number one spot.


 

Michael Lee is a writer for Nerdism Comics, and this makes the second list Jean Grey was in and then cut out of. If just she had a bigger chest. You can write to him at Nerdismcomics@yahoo.com

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